Where is this room? And this Hotel?
I can't remember how I arrived
How many times? I couldn't tell,
So often in this reality I dived!

Lying on this unknown bed,
Two handsome men next to me.
They sleep as if they have had
The most exhausting night there could be!

They know me, trust me : very well!
But yesterday we met for the first time.
Amazed they were, uncovering the veil
I was wearing to hide who I am.

Recognition from the posters spread over town
They have the feeling they know who I am
But they only know the face I own
And certainly not my soul and its harm!

Being here, listening to their breaths
Makes me forget that I have another life
Full of duties, where time too fast leaves :
I am a mother, I am a wife!

Why shouldn't I be allowed as well
To cheat, to betray, to enjoy
Feeling only pleasure, hearing the bells
When I am, if requested treated as a toy.

I pay for it, and get what I want
Never disappointed, for they want to satisfy
Realize my fantasy without them I can't
They never complain, never ask : why?

Too soon I'll be back to my loved ones
I'll feel better, at least for a while
No more pain in my soul, only in my bones
My soul darkened, never again white.

I'm unfaithful, and I pay for it
Judgment would fall on me if discovered
Surely worried about it, but just a bit
After all, only one should be bothered!

I can already hear my son, tomorrow
When I will arrive, tired but happy
His voice will awake the sorrow
And after that I will fell sleepy.

Going back to that public living
Smiling, faking, playing a part
Hoping that very soon again, I'll be leaving
For another night of sexy art.

I love my family, more then you think
Otherwise I would just leave them
And wouldn't spare so much ink
To explain what a cheat I am.

Rose Harris